By Quinn Eaton
Sources within a vague shouting distance of people with information are reporting that Joe Biden has officially picked his running mate for his 2020 presidential campaign: Bob the Tomato. Biden chose Bob the Tomato because he said he was a well rounded individual. Joe was quickly informed that having Bob the Tomato as his Vice Presidential Candidate was "impossible" and "fictional," and after a brief rebuttal, the former VP agreed.
Biden will now reassess his decision and officially announce his (second) choice for his running mate as soon as today.
Photo Credit: bigidea.fandom.com, breitbart.com
Authors: Thad Buchanan, Quinn Eaton, Cole Manion, DJ Pigg, Adam Redfern
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